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keepmywhiskeyneat:

TRUE STORY
One morning, I was awakened by a knock at the door. I rolled out of bed, threw a blanket over my shoulder because it was cold, and made my way to the front of the house. I opened the door and a very nice lady of some sort of christian denomination handed me a pamphlet and launched in to a well-rehearsed spiel about accepting jesus in to my life when she stopped mid sentence and gave me a peculiar look. I used this pause in her speech to politely decline her offer and wish her a pleasant morning. It wasn’t until I looked at what she handed me that I understood why I stopped her in her tracks and then proceeded to laugh for the next half hour by myself.
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keepmywhiskeyneat:

TRUE STORY

One morning, I was awakened by a knock at the door. I rolled out of bed, threw a blanket over my shoulder because it was cold, and made my way to the front of the house. I opened the door and a very nice lady of some sort of christian denomination handed me a pamphlet and launched in to a well-rehearsed spiel about accepting jesus in to my life when she stopped mid sentence and gave me a peculiar look. I used this pause in her speech to politely decline her offer and wish her a pleasant morning. It wasn’t until I looked at what she handed me that I understood why I stopped her in her tracks and then proceeded to laugh for the next half hour by myself.

camo-zamboni:

camo-zamboni:

camo-zamboni:

My roommate and his girlfriend got in the shower together and they’re… Talking about politics?

I was expecting to hear “OH GOD, HARDER,” not “George Washington was entirely correct in his prediction of what distinct parties would do to politics as a whole.”

Nope nevermind, there it is, apparently political debate is just their form of foreplay

STOP REBLOGGING THIS HE HAS A TUMBLR

(Source: camo--zamboni)

evilthecat:

aeon-fux:

differentrealms:

whitegirlsaintshit:

imbrittsimpson:

postracialcomments:

OKLAHOMA CITY (AP) — An Oklahoma City police officer was charged Friday with 16 counts including first-degree rape and sexual battery after being accused of assaulting at least eight women while on patrol.

Daniel Holtzclaw, 27, also faces charges of forcible oral sodomy and indecent exposure. Holtzclaw, a former standout football player in high school and college, was arrested Aug. 21. He remained in custody on a $5 million cash bond Friday, according to jail records.

He is accused of stopping women, who were all black and between the ages of 34 and 58, while on duty in Oklahoma City. Prosecutors allege that he raped two women and either fondled others or forced them to expose themselves, and police said there may be more victims.

Source

Justice for Daniel Holtzclaw GoFundMe

Justice for Daniel Holtzclaw Facebook

"Former standout football player in high school and college"

"He only assaulted older Black women"

*39 people raise over $7,000 to defend him*

Alternatively titled: how we discuss and treat white male criminals (rapists) in the United States

With the subtitle: how inhumane crime doesn’t really count when it’s done against black women

What in the hell

I feel sick 

this is disgusting

Anonymous

Anonymous asked:

Shut the fuck up about 50 shades of grey. No one fucking cares

infamousmoriarty:

oh hun

let me just give you a quick run down of all the things wrong with this ask:

1-you assume i care what some asshole anon has to say when i have 300 pounds and i’m going kikass birthday shopping today

2-you assume id care about some asshole anon any other day of the year

3-i care about the 50 shades of grey thing. and whether you do or not is irrelevant to me because you are, after all, just an asshole anon

4- this is my blog and i’ll post whatever the fuck i want, if you cant take three fucking posts about something without turning into a soggy cum stained dishrag then i suggest you make use of that unfollow button because youre gross

5- lemme break this down for you

if you dont care about this 50 shades situation, you need to grow the fuck up and look at the facts

the fact is the book was so misinformed that all the practises about bdsm culture were ignored and shit all over.

he ignores the safeword

he legitimately rapes her

he never explains everything about bdsm culture to her, shes so misinformed its ridiculous

and all of this is going even more public than it already has and its being romanticised and released on valentines day 

like “happy valentines honey! i bought some ropes i dont actually know how to tie and a whip i dont actually know how to use and i’m going to just gloss over the fact you’re uncomfortable because that clearly doesnt matter!”

incorrect use of a whip can cause organ failure

incorrect knots used on wristst or feet can literally cause them to need to be amputated

its perpetuating rape culture in ways ive never seen it be advanced to this leve; and if you dont care then youre truly disgusting 

you dont care about the kids not fully understanding their sexuality being abused by older people who they think are totally allowed to do this shit?

you dont care about the people that will be raped because of this because hey apparently rape is sexy?

you dont care about the fact that the bdsm culture is, once again, being portrayed as people who are fucked up and must have been abused to be that way rather than normal people who enjoy a kink in their own homes?

you dont care about the fact that youre not supposed to bleed on your first time. ever. and now tons more girls are going to think that its completely normal? that tons more guys will? that tons of people are going to think its expected for the female to bleed when SHE WONT IF SHES BEEN SUFFICIENTLY TURNED ON AND STRETCHED ITS REALLY NOT THAT HARD

you dont care about the stereotype of subs not actually enjoying bdsm culture is being widespread? that all subs dislike it and simply have an ulterior motive?

you dont care about the underlying message of the book being “a woman should give everything, including herself, to a man”?

you dont care about all the people in abusive relationships that will think “oh well this must be normal then” and stay there?

christian grey is a run-of-the-mill abusive boyfriend. he isnt a dom. 

a dom loves his/her sub completely and the motto of bdsm is "safe, willing and sane" (or something like that anyone feel free to correct me)

it means that both partners have to be completely willing, with boundaries, safewords and everything worked out before they even think about touching eachother intimately. 

if something is a boundary, you dont fucking do it

that simple

if the safeword is used it stops. everything stops

that simple

a dom should treat his sub like a goddamn princess (unless they have prearranged and understand that he wont eg-pet play, slave play where anything outside of the bedroom is also in the same dynamic HOWEVER IT IS STILL CONSENSUAL SO IT IS STILL OKAY)

a dom is not christian grey

but millions of people are going to think he is and are going to think that thats the way bdsm should be and they’ll get involved in something very dangerous if they dont have the real facts.

that people will think its romantic because this shit is scheduled for valentines day  to treat your partner like shit, abuse her, and that what? getting them off absorbs you of all your shit? no. this is so fucking gross and im not taking a backseat when this shit happens

so in conclusion

literally fuck you, you insensitive fuck stain, this issue is so fucking important.

mildlyautisticsuperdetectives:

dreamsankh69:

thebeldamsbuttons:

damianimated:

LETS PLAY A GAME. It’s called: Who directed it TIM BURTON or HENRY SELICK

We’ll start with the 2009 Laika film Coraline based on the novel by Neil Gaiman. Do you know who directed it? Burton or Selick?

image

Did you guess yet?

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If you guessed Henry Selick, you would be correct. Tim Burton actually had absolutely nothing to do with Coraline at all in anyway ever. Reminder: Tim Burton has NOTHING to do with Coraline. At all. But that was an easy one. Let’s go to the Walt Disney Pictures adaptation of Roald Dahl’s novel, James and the Giant Peach next.

image

Think you got it? Are you sure? Better double check…

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Oh, look. It’s Henry Selick again! Tim Burton actually interacted with this project, though only as a producer. Bet that was tricky… Next one! Let’s go to the Disney/Touchstone Pictures film Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas.

imageHave you guessed it correctly? Have you really?

image

Yep that’s right. Even Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas was directed by Henry Selick. Though Burton wrote the poem and created the characters in which Nightmare was based he didn’t have much interaction with the project beyond that. At the time he had already signed off to direct the film Batman Returns and did not want to be involved with the “painstakingly slow process of stop-motion animation.”

Looks like it was a trick quiz. But now you know Henry Selick, whom people rarely know of is responsible for many of the most well known stop-motion animated films. The more you know!

This isn’t even being qeued. This is just being reblogged, because some of you still don’t understand who directed Coraline.

People worship Burton, People should fear Selick.

Reblogging because the number of people who think Burton made Coraline is astounding. Although, to be fair, the marketing basically forced you into thinking it.

thatshowchoirgirl:

castielangelofthetrenchcoats:

sp00ky0wl:

ghostyfelix:

satohai:

iliketolight-thingsonfire:

fairysharkmother:

MOMMA WILL GIVE ADVICE.

ALWAYS REMEMBER: MENSTRUATING DOES NOT MAKE YOU BAD. IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE SICK. IT DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE DIRTY.

First of all, do not go swimming in the ocean to look for Momma. 
Momma will be right here.

Momma suggests that at first sign of blood, take tylenol. If you are super in tune with your body, take it when you estimate it will start soon!

Momma knows EXACTLY what to do for cramps. Eating cranberries or drinking their juice is a wonderful way to get rid of cramps.

Another way to help with the pain is to rest on your bed like in the picture, butt in the air and head on the ground. 

Also, if you do not like pads OR tampons, there are more solutions!

There is the softcup!

And the mooncup!

They are very similar to one another. They are basically soft, silicone cups that go up into your lady cave that collect the blood.The softcup is a bit more expensive.

Also, Momma says that if you want to have sex and not have gushing everywhere, you can use a softcup!

The mooncup is a lot like the softcup, but it is reusable. Momma will remind you that you MUST disinfect it in boiling water. 

You can even use natural sea sponge like a tampon! 
Momma says it’s okay. 

There are also cotton reusable pads!

Momma is also thinking of you men that have periods, too!
There is a special kind of boxers that you can buy with a special pocket for sanitary products! It also comes with a bulge.

The most important thing to do, menstruating or not, is to love and respect yourself. Do not feel ashamed, and get through it as well as you can!

Momma loves you!

Thank you momma.

I imagine Momma having a really typical haggard old smoker’s voice

MOMMA’S ON MY OWN DASH WHAT THE HECKLE

WAIT HOLD THE PHONE THERE ARE OPTIONS OUTSIDE OF PADS AND TAMPONS???

can i just say i love how momma includes trans men?? and thank you momma for the advice <3

I love momma! Everyone should follow momma because her and the rest of the sea family give amazing advice

(Source: fairysharkmother)

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